The Three-Week Tour

I'm taking advantage of my jet lag to catch up on blogging. Scott and I just returned from a three-week tour of the U.S., going from Chicago to Detroit to Denver to New York. It was the longest stint we've had back in America since moving abroad.

It's things like this -- iPads for ordering and browsing the web, leading to no socialization whatsoever at meal time and waiters wanting tips for not doing anything -- that make me disillusioned with America.

I found myself experiencing a roller coaster of emotions while back in the states. One minute I adored being able to read all the labels in a grocery store and staying in sturdy and well built buildings. Minutes later, I'd be flustered, shocked by the price of a sub-par sandwich or a pint of beer, or from getting the stink eye from a New York subway rider when I accidentally bumped into her while exiting the train (in Beijing that's the norm). 

I loved getting to catch up with friends and family, but also found the schedule taxing. Scott and I didn't have one night alone, always meeting someone for dinner or playing games with family. This was fabulous, don't get me wrong, but after 21 days straight it starts to get tiring. The biggest reprieve was skiing in Colorado, when we got to go to bed at 9 pm, exhausted from hitting the mountain hard. 

I recently read this great blog post on where home is for an expat and found myself identifying with this question (albeit much less than this guy who has been a nomad for 30-plus years). Even though I remembered the streets of New York and easily found my way back to the brow-threading salon and jewelry cleaner, I felt like a visitor, not someone who lived there -- or even used to live there. The ease of getting around invigorated me, but it wasn't entirely as comforting as I expected. I kept finding myself wishing I could mesh together parts of the U.S. and Beijing -- the cheap restaurants of China with the cleanliness of America's bathrooms with the no-tipping tradition of Beijing with the health-food options of New York. 

Same with conversations. I loved catching up with Kim and Casey on the ski slopes, sharing Mandarin words with Kristen and Laurie at a Lower East Side bar, and seeing Sam and Sarah's new home in Ann Arbor. But I found myself struggling to answer the "How's China?" question, unsure of what people wanted to know. One interaction that particularly amused me was with the dental assistant who asked how I was able to deal with "all the spitting" in China. I found it funny, considering she prods in people's mouths all day, unearthing food bits and salivia, and them watches people "rinse" (i.e. spit) all day long in her job. 

Perhaps the visit was a touch long, but I'm glad we got to see so many people (even though we didn't get to catch up with everyone). One thing's for sure: we're not going on any trips any time soon!